That's A Lot Of Flour!

This week I lost an additional 1.7kg, which takes my total weight loss to 16.2kg :) So this is me trying to carry the 16kg that I have lost over the last two months (8 x 2kg bags of bakers flour)... it is not easy!!! Although I have lost this much weight before, I have never really appreciated how much weight that actually is. Trying to hold the 16kg of flower for just a minute in order for my mum to take this photo was actually a struggle. It is easy to forget that I walked around each day carrying this extra weight. Granted, the weight was not all being supported by my arms....but it was hard!

I am sure that it does not come as a surprise that I am over the moon with my progress to date. Better still, I am so very excited to see what I will look like by the end of the year. What size will I wear? Where will I shop for my clothes? How far will I be able to run and cycle for? It is hard to guess how much I will lose in the next four months, especially as the typical plateau I have usually experienced by now has not yet set in. I guess the best way of "guestimating"is to look at my average weight loss to date, reduce it by some, and then multiply it by the number of weeks left until the end of this year. So assuming I lose 1kg a week starting from next week, I will lose an additional 16kg (total of 32)...However, if I can lose 1.5kg a week, then I can lose an additional 24kg (total of 40) by the end of the year. I am going to aim for an additional 20kg. It is going to be hard, but I have to work hard to lose as much weight as I can within these first 6 months. All my research indicates that the weight loss slows down significantly after the first 6 months.

So the truth is that not much has changed this week.  I ended up gong to the physio another few times for my back, but I feel 100% again. I spent this week resting my back under orders from my personal trainer and physio. While I  couldn't work on my weights, I could spend time doing cardio. Although I didn't manage to get to the gym as much as usual, I did try! Even when I worked late I went to the gym for a quick cycle etc. Anyway, I am sure there are always going to be times where I don't get to exercise as much as I want to. This week I am going to make sure I get there at least five times again.

This week I finished the prescribed anti-acid/reflux medication that I have been on since the surgery. I was looking forward to coming off this medication as it meant one less tablet to swallow, but the truth is I am now desperate for another prescription. I have felt like their is acid burning my oesophagus constantly for days. Gaviscon helps relieve the discomfort for a half hour or so, but then it comes back. Apparently this is quite common, but I am not sure how long I need to put up with it until the Doctor decides I need more meds. Alas, I am going to see him tomorrow morning to ask for more!

One big thing did happen this week - I had my first few sips of alcohol! I only had about 5 tiny sips of the red wine, but I felt fine. The 5 sips is a long way off what I use to be able to drink, but I didn't want to risk feeling sick in public. A general rule of mine over the last month has been 'don't try any new foods out of the safety of home'. This may seem strange, but some foods just don't seem to sit well with me yet. I am getting better, but it is always a risk in these early days.

Anyway, it is time for bed. As always, you can checkout the updated 'My Measurements' and 'Progress Photograph' pages with this week's progress.

Goodnight!

Just A Bit Of Window Shopping...

I have not shopped for any clothing in over three months! Not one thing! Despite being larger, I have generally enjoyed shopping for clothes throughout my adult life. Of course there have been some exceptions to my love of shopping. As a child in the 80's and early 90's there was not many clothing stores which catered for plus size clothing; certainly none which catered for teenagers. My mum would always try to find nice clothes from adult stores that would fit/suit me, but it was never what other young girls were wearing. As you can imagine, it was not a common occurrence to find nice clothes that fitted. When I did find clothes that fit, they were not the same styles that everyone else my age was wearing. I always looked different. By the age of twelve, I had learnt that if something fit me, I should buy it. Fast forward a bit short of a decade, and the Australian fashion market had begun to adjust to the ever increasing waistlines of the population. As the years have passed, the options available to larger women have continued to increase both locally and internationally. The only problem has been that I have never retrained myself that I don't need to buy anything that looks half decent ;) Thank god I don't have expensive tastes... yet!

So what does a reformed shopper do when she is no longer shopping for clothes? Shops for bodies of course! Now this may sound crazy to you, but this is something I have caught myself doing since I decided to go ahead with a VSG. I don't do this all the time of course, but every now and then when I out and about, I look at other ladies as they walk past and wonder which body size/shape I will end up being. I sort of "window shop" through all the bodies I see. This probably isn't the healthiest thing to do - I know! But! It has cemented the fact that I don't want to be the skinniest girl in the room, nor do I don't want to lose all my curves. I like having curves! I just want to have less... Anyway, the funny thing is that as people have been noticing my weight loss, they too seem to be "window shopping" for me. They don't seem to be shopping for bodies though, instead they are looking for faces. Personally I find this hilarious, especially because although my face will get thinner, I doubt it is going to really change that much. Nevertheless it is quite complementary. Perhaps I wouldn't find it so complementary if people were picking uglier woman to compare me to...but to date, all good! So here are the woman that people have said they think I will look like when I lose all my weight. What do you think?

 

Catherine Zeta Jones (The Mask of Zorro)

 

Rachel Weisz (The Mummy)

 

Audrey Tautou (Amelie)

I don't really see much similarity between these woman and myself, however it is nice to imagine isn't it :)

Time for reality and a quick update on my progress this week. This week I lost a total of 1.6kg, which takes my total weight loss to 14.4kg. I am really happy with my progress to date and hope that the weight keeps coming off. In an effort to get the weight off as quickly as possible and retraining myself to enjoy my new lifestyle, I have been heading to the gym as much as possible. I have been focusing on my cardio and light weights as instructed by my surgeon, dietician and personal trainer. This week I took it a bit to far to quickly, as I ended up hurting my back on Thursday evening at the gym. I spent the next few days in quite a lot of discomfort and decided to go to a physio to see if they could help (I was desperate), and they have helped significantly. I have been instructed to keep of weights  for a week, but I do intend to start walking again tomorrow evening. Let's see how this affects my weight loss for next week!

Tomorrow morning I am meeting with my dietician as I am entering my final week of the liquid to solid diet phase plan. This is a routine check-up which was booked weeks ago. I don't have any major concerns that I feel I need to discuss, but I do want check if she has any tips on how to keep my energy up through the afternoon. My concentration is not where it use to be at all, but it does take a significant beating between 2 and 6pm. I think that I need to make sure I have a second snack during this time, but it is the last thing on my mind. I will let you know what comes out of that meeting.

Anyway, it is getting late and I better sign off.

Goodnight all! xT

A Little Bit Less Obese...Yes please!

So today I am officially down to Class Two Obesity on the Obesity scale! The fact that I am even on the obesity scale is extremely embarrassing and humiliating...but I don't see a point in not saying it how it is on this blog. The truth is that although being honest about this hurts, my size is obvious for all to see on each and every day. I sincerely doubt that anyone is going to be shocked by the fact that I am more than just a bit overweight. I am what I am. It sucks big time, but I am changing :) Now this honesty may be hard for some people to understand, but one of the things you learn quickly as a fat chic is that it is best to say what others are thinking first! If you have watched Pitch Perfect and remember "Fat Amy", you must have heard this before. Putting yourself down before other people have a chance to do so, is the best way of emotional survival. It just hurts too much when someone puts you down and you are not prepared for it! It is so true that it is almost a science! The sad fact of this science is that your self confidence is generally non-existent, you continually put yourself down, and you don't really believe it if/when people complement you.

This may sound a bit grim but it really isn't! I love "Fat Amy" aka Australian actor Rebel Wilson. More importantly, I honestly think she is a great ambassador for curvy women around the world. She is who she is because of all the experiences she has lived through and she appears to embrace her shape to the fullest. Being fat all my life has made me the person that I am today.  Although it has in some ways limited the way I have lived my life, I believe that it has given me the personality that I have today. Personally, I think my personality is ok. I have some things I need to work on of course (who doesn't?), but I think I make good conversation with most people. Anyway! onto my progress over the last week...

This week I only lost 1.1kg which takes my total weight loss to 12.8kg! Not as much as some I have lost in the first few weeks, but any loss is a good loss :) Let me point you in the direction of the 'My Measurements' page and you may notice why I am still pretty happy with this week's progress. I have lost a total of 14.5cm from around my body this week alone. This is a significant reduction compared to last week's change in measurements. Happy! So why has my weight loss slowed while my change in measurements greater? I think it has lots to do with the fact that I started my personal training sessions this week. Personal training meant I could officially start doing weights. In case I didn't mention it before,  all weights and stomach exercises had been a no-go up until this week. This is a standard rule for all bariatric patients post-surgery, as the medical team are worried that you will damage your stomach or wounds. I think the timing they give you to start weights is actually perfect! Any sooner and I can imagine that I would have unintentionally hurt myself, as I did occasionally bend or stretch in a way which would feel like something was pinching. Although I have not been living under a rock, I have to be honest, this is the first time in my life I have understood the basic correlation between muscle training increases my metabolism, which then tricks my body into NOT going into starvation mode! Who know!? ...well now I do :)

I have a close friend who teases my that while I seem to have graduated from eating as much as his seven month old son, I can now eat as much as his two year old daughter. The funny thing is that this is so true! The good news is that my diet is continually getting more exciting. Although I am still only on one quarter to half cup portions depending on what it is I am eating, I can eat a greater variety of foods now which is great! This week I have managed to eat bolognaise sauce, tuna (with some light mayonnaise to make it smoother), slices of cheese and ham, and boiled egg. Although I am now allowed pasta, rice and dry crackers, I am keeping these out of my diet for now. I am sure I will start to have these again in the next few months, but as I am not craving them, I will try to abstain for now. Another change is that I can eat it much faster that I could a week ago. This makes it much easier to get on with the day between food times. The strange thing is that prior to doing the surgery, I thought it would be impossible to chew foods twentysix times before swallowing. Now, it has almost become second nature to chew all food twenty or more times before swallowing. I do slip up about once a week, and after this happens I do feel some extremely painful indigestion set in quickly. Tonight was one of these times but after watching me try to be sick for about fifteen minutes, my mum reminded me to smell some fresh bread. This is an old wives tale that is less of a take and more fact! Trust me, it works!

Anyway, I should hit the sack. Back to work tomorrow and I need to book tickets to Rottnest in the morning. Yes! I am booking tickets to Rottnest island in the morning. I am going to get in my bathing suit and not hate myself for it!

As always, you can checkout the updated 'My Measurements' and 'Progress Photograph' pages with this week's progress.

Goodnight all :)

Better Late Than Never....Right?

Let me start this week's update by saying I am sorry for the late posting! I know that some of you have come to expect an update each Friday evening, but as I have started work again I think updates may have to be pushed back by a day or two. Let's see how I go in the coming weeks! I have to say that it is an amazing feeling to have people contact me to check when I am next posting an update. It makes me really happy to know that people are interested in what I am talking about and seeing how I am progressing. So here I go!

This last week I lost 1.6kg which takes my total weight loss to 11.7kg! You can checkout the updated 'My Measurements' and 'Progress Photograph' pages with this week's progress. I am really happy with this loss especially since I didn't manage to fit in as much exercise as I had on my two weeks off work. What impresses me the most is not what I have achieved but the fact that if I had been on any other diet, my weight loss would have slowed or temporarily plateaued by now. I know I shouldn't speak to soon, but all my research indicates that the weight loss should be pretty steady for a while yet. I'm sure it won't stay above 1kg for long, but a girl can dream...well this girl can :)

I can hardly believe another week has passed. This week gone by brought lots of changes, both good and bad. The most significant change was that I returned to work. I have to admit that it wasn't the easiest of things to do, but that is mostly because I struggled to concentrate on any task for long. Of course this could be attributed to the fact that I spent a significantly long time sorting through boring emails, or it could be because I am living off 400-500 calories a day (excluding any calories burnt through exercise). My money is on the latter! Anyway, walking into the office on the first day was the hardest. I guess I felt like the colleagues who did know what I was doing in my two week "break" would expect a more dramatic change as I walked into the office. What if they expected me to be a size 12 already? What if they expected me to suddenly look like Catherine Zeta Jones? Newsflash! I don't look like CZJ, nor will I ever look like her! Nevertheless, it didn't take long for me to let go of fears and feel more comfortable letting colleagues see me eating my small meals.

The best thing this week was that people have noticed that I am looking different. Even those who don't know what I was doing on my "break" have commented that my skin is looking great, I look happier, that I look good, or even asking if I have changed my hair. Although I don't plan on explaining what exactly has changed, it is pretty nice to hear all the nice comments people have to say.

I know I have a long way to go, but I am getting closer than I was four weeks ago :) With each day comes new challenges and new lessons learnt. I just need to keep myself open to learning and to change. I'll get there.

Anyway, I should get some ZZZ's...the work week starts again tomorrow!

Speak soon xx

10kg Down and Over 40kg To Go!

So here I am, two weeks post-op and a total of four weeks since I started this journey. I haven't lost as much weight as I would have liked to this week, but the Dietician and Surgeon are both happy with my progress. Nevertheless, there is a niggling thought at the back of my head which keeps saying I need to lose more now! To date, I have lost 10.1kg, but only 1.4kg of that was this week. I know I must sound crazy because on any other diet I would be over the moon to record a loss over 1kg. This time, for some strange and stupid reason, I am expecting a lot more of myself. Perhaps it is because I have resorted to an extreme to lose the weight, or because I am eating so little and exercising so much, or maybe it is because I want this to be the last time I have to do this (so badly). Whatever the reason, I am going to try to celebrate my losses and not over criticise myself. I am not sure how I am going to do this, but I am. Any ideas are welcome!

In reality, not much has changed this week. I have continued to progress with consuming more fluids in less time, which is great! I am still itchy around my 5 incision sites, I still have sudden rushes of energy and then a substantial crash every so often, and my concentration is still lacking. The strangest thing is how cold I feel! Unless I am exercising, I feel the cold much more than I ever use to. I knew to expect this as it was recorded in many blogs that I found prior to surgery, but I didn't expect to feel it so dramatically. I can't wait for the summer!

The biggest change has come today as I graduated to Phase Two of my diet plan. After two weeks on liquids I was pretty excited about trying some new foods like scrambled egg, warm porridge and poached white fish! Unfortunately, my excitement was short lived. Although my stomach had slowly become accustomed to thick soups and pureed fruit over the last two weeks, I didn't realise that moving onto soft foods would make me feel so unwell. It turns out that my body didn't like having soft solids.

Today I managed to eat one scrambled egg and just over half a cup of mashed poached fish with peas. The fish was split over lunch and dinner (quarter cup each), and took me about 28 minutes to eat each time. By the end of the meal I had the worst heartburn and started to have reflux, which was very uncomfortable. My dietician says that I should be able to eat two to four times this amount in 20 minutes by the end of Week 3! Based on today's experience, this doesn't feel remotely possible, but I know it just takes time. As terrible as I felt, I have to admit that I have been pretty blessed post surgery. I have had no actual complications to date (touch wood), I have had minimal pain and discomfort, I am not hungry and I am achieving my goal - losing weight and getting healthier!

In the coming week, I will face a new challenge but I feel that I am ready for it. I return back to work on Monday and although I have limited concentration at the moment, I think I can manage this by taking frequent breaks and ensuring I don't work overtime. I purchased lots of little Tupperware last week which I intend to fill with meals before I go to work. I am not 100% sure what I am going to prepare yet but I have a two days to think about this...Here is to hoping the new week brings more weightloss and comfort eating new foods!

As always, I have updated the 'My Measurements' and 'Progress Photograph' pages with this week's progress. Chat soon xx